Why I Chose to Drop the Victim Mentality and Leave


So.    Why did I leave?

He has tried almost every way humanly possible to make up for the betrayal.  For three years he’s tried.  He’s only slightly wavered twice, and quite frankly, that’s a heroic feat, in my book.

So why would I leave someone who clearly loved me enough to try everything he could to undo the wrong and make it all right again?

The only answer I can come to is this:

I had to stop thinking that he has to make it right.

What was done cannot be undone.  I can try every positive outlook trend I can find, but I cannot let go of what was done.  And it kept coming back to “well he SHOULD do (insert anything at all) because of what he did!”

That’s no way to be in a relationship.  And I’m thankful I recognized it.  I deserve better.  And so does he.

The only way for me to stop feeling as though I am still owed some kind of behavior on his part is to stop expecting it.  He doesn’t owe me anything.  I chose to remove myself from victimhood, so I need to stop believing I’m owed retribution.  Retribution only comes along with being a victim.  And I refuse to be a victim.

So the best decision was to leave.  My heart was heavy, but my gut knew what had to be done.  And I followed my gut.  Well done, me.

walk away


Love and light,


When have you stepped away from victimhood?  Share in the comments, below!

Did this resonate with you?  Will it resonate with someone you know?  Share the knowledge!



4 comments on “Why I Chose to Drop the Victim Mentality and Leave

  1. I love this so much, and I love following your journey through all of your FB status updates. I’ve enjoyed being an audience to your journey as you find yourself and happiness.

  2. I love the self-reliance theme in this Melissa. Way to take responsibility for you can control and forget the rest.

  3. Pingback: Why I Needed My Authentic Self | Melissa Harrison

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