Why Reframing is the Secret Ingredient to Happiness


“If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.”  Lao Tzu

It’s been said that happiness is when what you think, do, and say are in alignment.  Perhaps that’s true, but how can we really define the state of happiness?  Don’t we all have a different idea of what happiness means to us?  Of course we do.

So how the hell can I be offering you a secret ingredient to happiness?

Here’s how.

No matter what your definition of happiness is, it starts with your thoughts.

If you are constantly entertaining thoughts that cause you to feel fear, anger, doubt, guilt, shame… chances are, you aren’t allowing much happiness in.

Notice I said THOUGHTS THAT CAUSE YOU to feel those negative emotions.  It is your thoughts about a situation, not the situation itself, that is causing you to hold away happiness.

There’s no recipe that includes a dash negativity, a pinch of complaining, a smidgen of whining, and a whole drop of bitching that can be baked into what will become a happiness pie.

There is, however, a way to flip the recipe in your favor.

That involves the secret ingredient:  reframing.

(There’s the TweetSpot! ^^^ Tweet it out, yo!)

Yes, you can do it.  Stop saying it’s hard.  It’s only hard if you keep saying it’s hard.

Whatever situation you find yourself in, you can choose to think of it in a way that causes you to feel grateful…or joyful…or lively…or reminiscent.  You can choose to find the good in any situation.

Here’s how:

1.  Call the situation what it is, with as little emotion as possible.

2.  Turn your focus to anything good that lies within the situation or that will come out of it.  This step may be hard at first, but keep at it.  It’s key.

3.  Keep your focus on the benefit(s) of the experience.

That’s it!  Just do it.  And keep doing it.

In every so-called crisis, lies the seed of opportunity.

It’s your job to find it.  Reframing is the secret ingredient.  Your happiness pie depends on it.  Oh, and add a dash of chocolate.

Love and light,



When have you reframed your thoughts about a situation and found the seed of opportunity?  Or just felt better about something?  Recognized a change in yourself because of it?  Or discovered a pattern within yourself that you were able to change to increase your happiness?

Please share in the comments.  It may help someone else recognize a way to increase their own happiness.

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3 comments on “Why Reframing is the Secret Ingredient to Happiness

  1. In the past when I thought something might transpire that would be an inconvenience or annoyance to me, I would think, “I’ll be so mad if that happens,” or some variation of the negative response I would expect to have. One day I realized that probably isn’t so helpful and now when I catch myself thinking about how upset I will be, I rephrase the thought, “if x happens, well, then x will have happened.” By thinking of the negative emotional response I would have – I was inviting only bad vibes. My replacement (or reframed) statement is much more like a blank slate where a positive result can be created.

  2. melissacatherineharrison@gmail.com

    EXACTLY! Well said, Megan.

  3. Such truth, Megan. What we focus on, we get more of. I love the idea of the “blank slate” statement. Excellent.

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